If you’ve passed the age of 20 a long time ago, were these hard truths that you wish your parents told you before you passed the big 20? We all have great parents, but honestly, there are some things I wish they’ve told me earlier instead of leaving it to me to learn the lessons by myself. Have you thought the same too?
Here are 10 hard truths we wished that our parents had told us. If you’re nearing 20, then you really have to know these, if your parents have not told you yet, that is.
It’s a big world out there, and not everyone will like you
When you’re with your family, you get unconditional love from your family. In order to please them, all you got to do is to make sure to get home before 12 midnight, get good grades at school, spend time with them and boom, you got everyone in the house or everyone that matters actually, liking you. Go out into the world and you’ll realise there’s no blueprint, no cheat sheet, no way to please everyone. Suddenly, you’re confused and wondering why some things you do cause others to dislike you even if you don’t mean to offend them.
Go out into the world and you’ll realise there’s no blueprint, no cheat sheet, no way to please everyone. Suddenly, you’re confused and wondering why some things you do cause others to dislike you even if you don’t mean to offend them.
It’s okay that not everyone likes you, in fact, it’ll be weird if everyone likes you
You spent almost your entire life being moulded according to what your parents want that by the time you come out to the real world, it becomes an instinct to change yourself to become likeable. You wished you were told that it’s okay if you can’t please everyone. You wished that you could have realized earlier that out of everyone you must please, you must please yourself first.
People aren’t nice
That’s a fact. People are never nice to you, not unless they want you to do something for them. Nice people don’t last long in the real world anyway. Which brings us to the next point.
It never pays to be nice
When you’re young, it’s a good quality to be nice. Nice means popular among friends, family and teachers. Friendship, allies, brotherhood, sisterhood, well, all these might seem important when you’re young, but when you enter your 20s, you need to understand this: It’s a dog-eat-dog world out there, no matter where you are or what you do. If you’re nice, be prepared to be eaten alive.
There are always consequences to things that you do
Back when you’re young, you did something wrong, and your parents protected you from the consequences. You dirtied a brand new shirt in Kiddy Palace, your parents screamed at the sales assistant and threw a wad of money at her. You hit someone in school, your father came down to the school and talked to the teacher, demanding to know what happened and make the poor teacher so frazzled she forgot to punish you.
You thought that’s the natural order of the world, only to be rudely awakened when you start reaping what you sow, having to take responsibility for things that you do. A simple mistake you make might just haunt you forever, or at least that’s what it’ll seem like to you. Your university days might be spent alone, or you’re caught on STOMP doing something hateful and gets hated by the entire country. You wished you’ve known earlier so you can show some restraint.
It’s not the end of the world if you fail at something
When you’re young, you get indoctrinated (for your own good) to believe that grades are all that matter, and a single failure means your whole life is gone. You came to realize that this was just an illusion to motivate you to work harder, the whole carrot-and-stick schmick. You’ll break down, hyperventilate, panic and give up on things that other people has like making friends, going out, having fun; at the end of the day, you’ll come to realize that by giving up on these things you used to deem a waste of time, you’re missing out on things that are pretty important in life.
The world doesn’t really care about you
Yup, that’s right, unlike when you’re young and you get unconditional love from your family, it doesn’t work that way in the world out there. The only thing the world really cares about is whether you’re able to give them what they need. Which brings us to the next point.
To get what you want, you have to give people what they need
And it’s not just in work, getting a job, or what not. It’s in every aspect of life. You want a boy/girlfriend? Can you satisfy her physical and emotional needs? You want a clique of friends. Are you able to interest them enough to spend more time with you? Want to get a cushy job. Do you have a rich dad or able to close deals worth millions for the company?
It’s the nasty people that make you grow
Nice people are the ones who finds it too harsh to tell you these truths. They’ll rather keep that sense of “nice-ness” and watch you fail day after day. The nasty ones are the ones who will motivate you to improve in life, whether they mean it or not, because they provide the motivation you need to win. You wished you learnt that earlier so you can improve so much faster instead of wasting time complaining about these people to the nice ones.
It’s the results, not the effort
When you get bad results, your parents will comfort you when they know you’ve tried your best. They’ll tell you, it’s okay, there’s always next time. Don’t expect that treatment when you’re out there. You are what your results are. You can put in 1100% effort, but if you’ve got nothing to show for it, you’re not putting in any effort. Don’t expect to be given leeway because you’ve “tried your best”. Life just doesn’t work that way.
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