How to tell whether one is a Singaporean without speaking to him / her

Almost more than 30% of people in Singapore comprise foreigners, and without a word exchanged, one can mistake a PRC Chinese as a Singaporean Chinese or a Filipino as a Malay. But there’re still ways to differentiate them! And if you’re easily offended, I’ll suggest you not to read this. If not, just laugh and share it!

In a wrong queue
queue
You see a queue comprising all females and see one male there? Most likely he’s queuing because he’s a Singaporean, and not because there’s a free tampon. I tell you arh, it doesn’t matter what the queue is for.

Count money openly at 3.00 a.m.
count-money
I know I’ve done it before. I mean, if someone robs me, the police will find him within seconds, right? And I get to be on TV. Crimewatch says one leh. They got special GPS one, right?

No smile, eye contact or small talk
inthelift
If you’re in a lift with a Singaporean, he will most likely just STFU (shut the fuck up). Even when he has no phone with him. Say “how are you” and most likely you’ll receive this reply: “I don’t want to buy it.”

Sleep anywhere
stand-sleeping
What you thinking? I literally meant “sleep” lah. I don’t know whether it’s due our long working hours, or NS has taught us well. Put me in a crowded train and I can still sleep while standing up.

Wear a pair of glasses
glasses
Not I say one hor. Statistics tell-ed me one hor. Don’t ask me to cite with APA or MLA, please.

Get offended with this post and complain with self-righteous comments
stomp
Are you angry? Want to sign on to be a keyboard warrior? Okay. Here’s a stamp of approval. You’ve just received a pink IC.

This Singapore love story set in the 90s shows you why you should never wait for tomorrow. Watch it without crying:
Advertisements  

Enjoyed this article because it’s both informative and entertaining? If so, you should download the Goody Feed app so that you won’t miss out on any articles, as there are app-exclusive contents as well! Also, join our Telegram channel if you use Telegram often!

Latest & Popular Articles You Must Not Miss:


Advertisements  

Advertisements  

Our Most Popular Videos You Must Not Miss:
Advertisements  
 
This Singapore love story set in the 90s shows you why you should never wait for tomorrow. Watch it without crying:
The Goody Feed Team comprises either several in-house writers or an individual in-house writer who prefers to stay anonymous. The reason to stay anonymous is simple: a writer won’t want his girlfriend to read an article like “10 things boyfriends hate about their girlfriends”, right?