Superhero Amulets (& Other Weird Ones) Are Now a Reality Though They Might Not Be Sold

Image: Ipoh 怡保 Facebook Page

I have a confession to make: I love superheroes. 

In fact, I love them so much I would wear a mask, go out in the middle of the night and start speaking in a deep voice.

“I’m Batman,” I croak to the pharmacist. “Do you have the goods?”

Her piteous look could kill even the most hardened man. “Sure you are. Give it a rest on those pills would you? You’re getting even battier than usual. And I don’t mean the Batman kind of bat.”

Just then the sound of police sirens reverberate through the night.

“That’s my cue, gotta go.” I wave goodbye and attempt to make a fancy exit, but just end up stumbling on my other foot.

“Hey Batman!”

I turn back. “Yeah?” I flash my best charismatic Bruce Wayne smile, the kind that lands girls in bed within miliseconds.

“Go get a life; Batman is way more jacked than you.”

Suffice it to say, I was broken after that. Broken as a bat, you could say. But just when I was seriously considering hanging up my cape (mask), I came across a series of pictures.

Image: Ipoh 怡保 Facebook Page

S-Superhero amulets???

Image: Imgflip

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Superhero Protection

I’m sure you know what an amulet is for:

To dig your nose when you can’t quite reach into the inner tresses of course.

But did you know? A few other people use it as a lucky charm of sorts, with the belief that it will actually protect them from life and its goddamn lemons.

Image: Know Your Meme

No idea whether it actually works on that level, though.

Yet here’s the thing; amulets, while divine in nature, aren’t quite as divine in aesthetics. In fact, you would be lucky to have one you can stare at past five seconds, seeing how the bulk of them are pretty much as dull as your discipline master’s face at 7:20 a.m.

Or that’s what we thought, until Facebook Page Ipoh 怡保 (yes, the Ipoh in Malaysia) shared a series of photos featuring cartoon-inspired Thai amulets.

And incredibly, the Avengers are actually part of it.

Image: Ipoh 怡保 Facebook Page

Though the expressions do get a little… stony.

Image: Ipoh 怡保 Facebook Page

But hey, at least it isn’t ashy.

And Ironman just looks like it’s gonna kick some ass.

Image: Ipoh 怡保 Facebook Page

Check out these other familiar faces too.

Like our all-time favourite in the skin-tight suit and the curvy ass:

Image: Ipoh 怡保 Facebook Page
Image: Ipoh 怡保 Facebook Page

The blue cat with prominent ears…

Image: Ipoh 怡保 Facebook Page

The big, not so friendly bully (though admittedly he’ll probably scare off everything in sight)…

Yoda and his three banana minions…

Image: Ipoh 怡保 Facebook Page

A generic storm trooper…

Image: Ipoh 怡保 Facebook Page

And even the most classic of them all.

Image: Ipoh 怡保 Facebook Page

If that’s not the best way to express your saltiness, I’ve no idea what would.

But wait…

While Netizens were understandably excited about it…

Image: Ipoh 怡保 Facebook Page

It seems that the amulets might not be marketable products, as there’s actually no link provided for online orders and stuff.

(Article continues below) Xing Xing is a 34-year-old Singaporean lady who decides to meet up with an online friend she found in Facebook. But it turns out that he’s not what he seems to be: Prepare boxes of tissue and watch the saddest Singapore Facebook love story here:

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Superhero amulets

Now, I can’t deny that it’s a pretty interesting prospect. In danger? Well, just count on your Ironman amulet to blast it out of the way. Although I’m pretty sure even Ironman can’t do shit if a 5-ton truck is speeding at you. But still, it’s a real refreshing take on the classic notion, and one that I embrace with open arms.

There’s just one thing though.

Where’s Batman when you need it?!?!

Image: Imgflip

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Zhi Hao

Zhi Hao

Just your average Singaporean guy who tends to write aimlessly, work out inefficiently and sleep soundlessly.
Zhi Hao