Before I start, let me just pose you a simple question:

Have you ever eaten at a S11 coffee shop?

If you have, please, skip past the next two paragraphs.

If you have never eaten there before, you can scroll to the top of this app (you’re reading this in our free app, right?!), search for Zhi Hao and enjoy the rest of his finely-dusted articles that preach poetics about such sombre matters as underwear thieves being caught in broad nightlight.

If you don’t know what an S11 coffeeshop is, hi-5; I had no idea what is it prior to reading about it too.

But that’s not the point; the point’s that something has happened to all existing S11 coffee shops. And the instigator, the perpetrator, the mastermind behind it all… is none other than…

1. Broadway

Yes, ladies and gentlemen; Broadway has officially taken over all 23 existing S11 coffeeshops.

But if you’re wondering what the hell a professional theatre would want to do with a bunch of coffeeshops, I’m talking about this Broadway.

Speaking of which, Broadway and S11 are essentially rival chains. So it’s basically this all over again:

“BROADWAYYYYYYYYYY”

“S11111111111111”

“BROADWAYYYYYYYYYYYYY”

“S11111111111111111111”

“BROADWAY- you know what screw this. You want me? You can have me.”

2. How much did it cost?

According to Straits Times, the move cost Broadway an estimated $200 million. This will make it the largest purchase of its kind for a coffee-shop chain to date.

I don’t know about you, but $200 million is quite a lot. Not as much as my uni fees, but it’s pretty… up there.

3. Broadway announcement

And as customary of any takeover, Broadway had its say, in the form of an announcement in Chinese newspaper Lianhe Zaobao.

“We will renew the good brand established by S11 over the past 24 years,” the announcement said in Chinese.

“We will continue to provide the public with delicious, economical and quality food and drinks.”

4. The List

After nights and nights of tireless searching and insomnia, we’ve adapted a list from another website that documents the exact affected parties in the whole Broadway-S11 saga:

1. 132 Jurong Gateway Road, #01-273
2. 51 Ang Mo Kio Avenue 3, #01-03
3. 711 Ang Mo Kio Avenue 8, #01-3501
4. 504 Bishan Street 11, #01-444
5. 713 Ang Mo Kio Avenue 6, #01-4032
6. 302 Woodlands Street 31, #01-277
7. 304 Woodlands Street 31, #01-125
8. 640 Bukit Batok Central, #01-40
9. 744 Yishun Street 72, #01-197
10. 530 Ang Mo Kio Avenue 10, #01-2379
11. 450 Ang Mo Kio Avenue 10, #01-1747
12. 43 Holland Drive, #01-75
13. 727 Clementi West Street 2, #01-294
14. 347 Bukit Batok Street 34, #01-252
15. 101 Yung Sheng Road, Taman Jurong Theatre
16. 117 Killiney Road
17. 34 Upper Cross Street, #01-132
18. 630A Woodlands Ring Road, #01-01
19. 787B Choa Chu Kang Drive, #01-241
20. 107 Hougang Avenue 1, #01-00
21. 110 Lengkong Tigar,#01-239
22. 342 Ang Mo Kio Avenue 1, #02-1561
23. 342 Ang Mo Kio Avenue 1, #02-1563

Oh, wait. So that Bukit Batok coffee shop we’ve been to near the MRT is a S11. Now this shows how much we focus on just the food and not the brand of the coffee shop.

5. Will there be any change in tenants?

We all have a favourite food stall we hold closer to our hearts than our own parents. And as such, we really don’t want to bid goodbye to the tenant of that particular stall over some small-scale takeover that spans a mere $200 million.

If you’re having minor panic attacks because you don’t know whether your Uncle Tan will be forcefully evicted and forced to peddle his fishball noodle business on the streets, don’t be.

According to Mr Hong Pin, chairman of Foochow Coffee Restaurant and Bar Merchants Association (represents over 400 coffee shops in Singapore), customers would not see “any drastic changes to the stall at the coffee-shops”.

“Broadway will take over the business as it is, so the existing stalls should all stay there,” he said.

And while I might not know who he is, what I do know that I can definitely trust a man with a chair.

Which leads to…

6. Price changes

Now, I might love my uncle Tan who dishes up quite literally the best soaking wet fishball noodles in Singapore, but if the prices are going to rise because of some unexplicable reason I’m still going to flip out.

This concern wasn’t a solitary worry on my part, however, as Mr Hong Pin has spoken out in regards to this pressing issue.

“I think, at the start, prices should be quite stable and stay as they are,” said Mr Hong.

“But later on, if the new management wants to upgrade or renovate the coffee shops, then it’s another matter.

“If they put in more investment, their rental prices might go higher.”

For the sake of Mr Tan and my poor wallet, please no.

7. Transitional takeover

Incidentally, a transitional takeover is expected to materialise within the span of three months.

The S11 coffeeshops, however, will keep their names.

Three months for a $200 million deal. Powderful lah.

8. Largest coffee shop chain in Singapore?

With this takeover, Broadway raised its fleet of coffee shops from a modest 22 to a downright place-hogging 45, though we aren’t sure whether it makes them the biggest player in the game with the likes of Chang Cheng Group, Kimly Group and Kopitiam Group still in the mix.

But at least now, we know that Broadway in Singapore isn’t a theatre.

9. Not the first, and certainly not the most expensive

You might think that $200 million’s a pretty hefty sum for some 23 coffee shops, but check this out; in 2015, Yong Xing Coffee Shop in Bukit Batok was actually sold for a record $31 million!

And it’s just one coffee shop.

The fengshui there must be pretty huat. Maybe because Goody Feed’s office is in Bukit Batok.

10. All in all…

I would say that there’s no real need to start worrying yet, seeing how things seem set to stay the same. But you can’t deny that the future’s a definite thought-provoker. I mean; who ever saw this coming?

So our advice?

Appreciate what you have right now, and start paying more attention to Uncle Tan and his roving eyes while he prepares your soup. After all…

Like the ending of Avengers Infinity War, you really don’t know what’s going to happen (yeah it’s getting old, but we can’t help it. We just don’t feel so good about leaving it out…)

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