11 real shits we all face when shopping in Ikea

Last Updated on 2016-05-19 , 1:54 pm

Okay, we all love Ikea, don’t we? Whether you’re there for the furniture, the window shopping, the food or for a date, it’s the best place to waste spend your entire day. There’re two Ikea outlets in Singapore, and both are just as good—the only key difference is that the one in Tampines has got free parking, so you can stay there as long as you want without worrying about your cashcard.

But it isn’t all good in Ikea, because we’re Singaporeans, and we like to complain.

You’ll be buried in the crowd
It doesn’t matter what time you go: it seems like it’s always crowded. It’s not just furniture, furniture everywhere—it’s people, people everywhere. This is one of the places whereby you can mess with an item for hours and no sales assistant will still come to you.

You’ll lose your way
Although there’re maps around, it’s easy to lose your way there. It’s like a maze whereby you have to remember the furniture you’ve passed by—if not, you could be going round and round and round for hours, searching for the toilet and all you see are toilet bowls meant for display.

You’ll regret after choosing something you want
Because ten minutes later, you’ll come across something cheaper and better. You grab that, and another ten minutes later, you’ll see yet another similar item that is cheaper and better…

You’ll find children running around like they’re in Running Man
They sometimes become projectiles and could hit you before you know it. Note to self: when I’ve got kids, keep them in the playground.

You’ll get hungry and cannot find the restaurant
You know there’s a restaurant somewhere, but after half an hour, you’re still looking for the restaurant. And when you find the restaurant, it’s closed. #FML #truestory

You don’t understand Swedish
So, you see a chair that seems to have some special function. You look at the name of the chair, and it’s in Swedish. Thank God for Google Translate, but why can’t they also provide wi-fi for us to translate all those Swedish words?

You spend 5 hours to buy a can opener
You know what you want to buy, so you make your way there. The search, the walk and the queue all means that the can opener that costs $5 requires a totality of 5 hours.

You can’t find help when you need one
I’m pretty sure the sales assistants aren’t paid commission, because they’re pretty invisible when you need them. The only staff that I often see are the cashiers.

The queue. Yes, THE QUEUE
Have you seen the checkout queues in Ikea? No? Then you’ve not seen the worst queue in the world.

You realize the taxi queue moves very sloooooooooowly despite many taxis coming every few seconds
Because each person would take minutes loading all his items into the taxi, and another one minute trying to close the boot or door of the taxi. I think taxi drivers should really start their meter once they put the first item in, if not very lugi leh.

You reach home and still have to assemble the items
Assembling can be fun, but when you lose a critical screw, you’re screwed.

Top Image: anshu18 / Shutterstock.com