Mum: Boy ar, your birthday coming liao, what do you want for birthday?
Me: I want to tio 4D, receive Ang Bao, fa some da cai this year, and also have a cake.
Mum: You dang gu gu lah. Where got such things one?
Me: Who say don’t have?! Le Kua.
A pregnant woman was so annoyed at a noisy baby that she threw a pot of burning mala at the baby. At the worst part of this? She wasn’t charged. Click on the image below to read about this shocking incident:
Georgina Koh is in 3019 while we are all still in 2019.
Birthday cake that dispenses money, has MJ ‘FA’, gold coins and ingots plus 4D image
Normally the title would be a gist of what is to come in the paragraph.
But seeing as to how awesome this darn cake is, I couldn’t help but list out all the features of this cake.
I mean, just take a look at the picture again and again and again in its full glory.
It’s new year and most of our resolution should have some form of ‘get rich or die trying’ maxim.
4D allows you to get there quick without running the risk of meeting Yan Luo Wang early.
Maybe just a small hole in the pocket.
Nuff said. I mean you do know that the golden crackers in your Yu Sheng are meant to symbolize 金银财宝 right?
For the unacquainted, this word stands for fa, which loosely translates to ‘prosper.’
It’s also a pretty damn good tile to have in Mahjong.
But lately, my relatives have been telling me that I’ve fa fu (发福), which is phonetically similar to (發), but actually means that I’ve gotten fat.
“Enter to Win (ETW)”
This button is akin to an Ang Bao because if you’ve seen the video, it basically causes the cake to eject a huge swathe of cash like it’s the most natural thing to do.
So you are asking: “There’s a video?”
Yes, Imma share this Goody Video Feed with you below:
The first Blockbuster of 2019
I kid you not.
After pressing on ETW button, the lucky woman in the video suddenly lurches into a bout of i-can’t-believe-this-is-happening hand-gesturing motion.
She does this not once, nor twice, but three times before the ATM-of-a-cake is unable to eject more cash.
At the end of this video,
Cai Shen Ye (财神爷) someone (presumably the person who bought this cake for her) can be seen gathering the notes together in a pile for her.
Although it is not known if the cash actually comes with the cake purchase.
This cake-o-king is the brainchild of home baker, xaviertybakes.
A quick check on her IG reveals that she has 917 followers and 138 posts as at time of writing.
From her IG, it is evident that while she does bake other themed cakes, the recent ones that warrant videos are none other than the prosperity-themed ones.
Image: xavierty Instagram
To order from xaviertybakes currently requires a 1 month notice in advance.
Her Facebook page is Georgina Koh, and here are just some of the prosperity-themed ones because that’s why you’ve come in here, right?
Post viral-fame, I’ve a sneaking suspicion that my mum needs to place the order today in time for my birthday celebration in March.
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