If you’ve watched Crazy Rich Asians, you’d have realized there’s a joke that only Singaporeans would have understood. But let’s face it: some of us went into the cinema, expecting some Jack Neo jokes but walked out of the cinema empty-joked.
And to fill up that void, here are a few Singapore jokes that only Singaporeans (and Malaysians) would have understood.
Because we need something to perk us up.
Coffee Vs Bread
What’s noisier: coffee or bread?
Bread. Because BreadTalk (Bread talks) while Kopitiam (kopi diam).
Butter Out of the Window
Why does Ah Lian throw butter out of the window?
Because she wants to see Butterfly.
Heaviest Food in the world
What’s the heaviest food in the world?
Wonton mee (one-ton mee)
Barbie Dolls Queuing
Why does Barbie dolls always die when they queue up for Hello Kitty?
Because they’re barbecued (Barbies Killed)
The two most beautiful MRT stations in Singapore
Which MRT stations in Singapore are beautiful?
Simei (“is pretty” in Chinese) and Tanah Merah (“of course is pretty lah” in Chinese)
Singlish Food Names
An ang mo went back to his country after visiting Singapore, and was impressed with how simple Singlish is. He told his friends, “I was in Singapore and guess what? Chicken is called ‘ze ge’, pork is called ‘ze ge’, egg is called ‘ze ge’, broccoli is called ‘na ge’ and spinach is called ‘na ge’!”
What do you get when a vegetable take a selfie?
Student Being Expelled
One day, a student bid goodbye to Mr Chee. The student was expelled the next day.
4D & Wife
The difference between 4D and a wife is that one, you’ve a chance to win. The other, you never win.
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