A 23-Year-Old S’porean Explains Why He Doesn’t Use Facebook on His Mobile

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Prior to the formulation of this article, my boss, who’s old and fat AF, had a pre-conceived notion that everyone, everyone, has Facebook downloaded on their mobiles.

So imagine his shock when I revealed that I didn’t have Facebook installed on my handheld. Not because I don’t have space in my phone for it (not really) but because… wait for it, I don’t need it.

Now, why, you might ask.

First Reason: Instagram

Seriously, who needs Facebook when you’ve got Instagram? Like really. 

For starters, Instagram offers a more user-friendly interface as compared to Facebook. And I’m not even talking about the god-tiresome Messenger App (why the **** do they have to separate it into two apps? Totally redundant).

Instead, I’m talking about two primary criteria: basic premise interface & time it takes to load information on the page.

I don’t know about you, but Instagram just feels smoother to the touch. Everything’s easy on the eye and brain, whether it’s the layout, colours or even functions. It’s just like this Goody Feed app that you’re reading from: simple, clean and just functional.

On the other hand Facebook just reeks of an artfully decorated mess. With a variety of colours that don’t gel well enough, it just sucks the soul out of your brain, minute by minute. And let’s not even talk about time taken to load info, because by the time I’m done with Facebook I’ll be lying on a chair with frizzly hair on my head and empty eye sockets for eyes.

But I won’t lie; there’s also something about browsing through pictures that triumphs over walls of text. Think picture books over biographical books. Like really, Donald Duck over another Donald, any time of the day mang.

Second Reason: Newsfeed crackdown

For the main course, we have Facebook’s rather controversial News feed issue. Lest you’re unaware, there was a Facebook crackdown on news feed companies in January 2018 (though there were admittedly prior crackdowns, but this one’s by far the one that is so openly mentioned) in favour of posts by friends & family.

In other words, you’re going to see more of friends humblebragging.

Look, let’s be honest; I log onto Facebook if I’m feeling especially stupid and in need of some heavy-weighted (or some soft) news to feel good about myself, or especially bored and in need of some mindless entertainment; certainly not to see pointless posts by friends documenting how tired they are and what they’re gonna have for goddamn lunch.

Ah Hock loved Michelle and asked her, ‘Ai stead mai?’ in the 90s. Today, he tried again but would it work? Prepare some tissue paper and watch their love story here:

If I need to see influencers showing off their lifestyle, I can do it on Instagram.

INDEED, with Instagram in the mix, Facebook (in my opinion anyway) has been relegated to the same category MySpace was once relegated to: irrelevancy. 

Ironic, really, considering how Facebook was the chief perpetrator behind MySpace’s downfall, and now it’s on the receiving end of the stick.

Third Reason: Space

In case you’re wondering, I’m not talking about personal space, though we will breach that threshold in just a minute. No instead I’m talking about space in terms of phone Scientology: phone space. And damn if Facebook doesn’t take up a whole lot of that.

At the last recorded time of checking, Facebook’s phone storage space (for Apple phones) required stands at 314 MB. And I haven’t even included that god-awful Messenger mix into the equation, where it takes up 131.3 MB. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is pretty much 445.3 MB of your phone space eaten up. What’s this, a RPG game?

Lest you’re not aware, the Goody Feed app, for the Android version, is only 8.1 MB in size (oh yeah we actually put in a lot of effort to keep it lightweight). In Apple, it’s just 24 MB.

Our developer told us that 9 MB for Android and 30 MB for Apple is the average.

Taking into mind that some phones run with just 12 GB of storage space, it will mean that Facebook’s exploiting near 1/24 of the phone’s storage space. And really, with the millions and billions and trillions and brillions of phone apps out there in the app store, does Facebook really warrant such a significant chunk of your precious space chest?

Incidentally, Instagram consumes just 81.3 MB. Yeah, just justifying my cause.

Fourth Reason: Privacy

If there ever was a CIA of social media apps, it would be Facebook. Hands down. No doubt whatsoever.

I mean; I don’t even have to make things up. Just recently, Mark Zuckerberg was grilled in court (no we didn’t get a charcoal black Mark Zuckerberg in turn) for Facebook’s reported data privacy issues. And it speaks volumes when the founder has to consistently make subsequent apologies for it.

But really, it was no exact secret. All along we’ve had a sneaky feeling that Facebook is intruding on our privacy more than we would have liked, but we never really knew to what extent. Until this.

According to The RegisterCambridge Analytica and other unconnected companies and campaigns were behind the compromising of more than 87 million Facebook users. This revelation led to Facebook having to suspend a rough 200 other apps that were possibly infiltrating user privacy (no worries, the Goody Feed app doesn’t use Facebook API so it’s a very safe app).

And then recently, Facebook’s mobile app supposedly startled Android users when it started asking for root-level access on their apps, without any warning whatsoever. The social media platform then explained the unexpected move, stating that it was the result of a programming blunder by its engineers,and that it had no real desire to get superuser clearance. Notice that it expressed ‘no real desire’ rather than ‘no desire’. Transparent as it may be, to me, it still signals an intent to do so.

Admittedly there are instructions on how to disable updates for Android users, but certain users might face this questionable dilemma.

Now, I won’t need to write more about this: that is the exact reason why #DeleteFacebook exists.

Final words

Look, I didn’t have Facebook on my mobile, and I probably will never download it. Not because I hate Facebook (quite the opposite really, seeing how I still browse through it from time to time on a daily basis).

It’s really, as I stated in the first paragraph, because I don’t need it.

And also, the privacy issues just turn me off.

Now, I’ll just happily use Instagram, coz it’s not Facebook…oh wait.

Instagram is owned by Facebook.

#ironylevel99

Do come back to the Goody Feed app tomorrow for more commentary!