Are you sick of relatives asking if you have a boyfriend?
Reader: Definitely
Do you dread Chinese New Year because you feel pressured to say those four words that your extended families so desperately want to hear? (I got a BTO)
Reader: Oh my god yes
Well, worry no more, because now you can rent a boyfriend for CNY!
Reader: Yay! That’ll be good for- wait what?
S’porean Offers Boyfriend Rental Services For CNY; +S$58 for BTO status
While every single person enjoys getting ang baos on CNY, no one can avoid the uncles and aunties who always seem to reserve all their kaypohness for this particular holiday.
And they are most concerned about the state of your romantic life, which can get annoying.
Thankfully, one man has offered his services online to be your boyfriend for the lunar new year.
He is not cheap, however.
As you can see, he charges $88 an hour for a minimum of two hours. But that’s if you want a regular boyfriend.
If you want a “super charming boyfriend”, one who’ll act like the “perfect husband”, well then it’s going to set you back over $188.
He does have a quintessential “husband” face though, so maybe it isn’t so expensive after all.
You can pay more for touching
You ladies can be assured that this man is no prude; he’s ok with hugging, holding hands, and even kissing in front of your relatives, as long as you cough up some cash.
– Hold hands in front of relatives: S$58
– Hug in front of relatives: S$68
– Kiss in front of relatives: S$188
He is very strict about one thing though – his services do not include sex. So keep your hands off him, ladies.
BTO ai mai?
Perhaps the most enticing offer is the one regarding your BTO status.
For just $58, this man will tell your relatives that you’ve already ‘BTO-ed’.
In addition to getting paid for his services, you will also have to give him all your ang baos.
If the ang bao money he collects exceeds S$200, Luo says that he will also feed his “partner” during dinner and cook for them during steamboat sessions.
Those who book him by 23 Jan will get 8 per cent off the total bill.
Just kidding
According to Mothership, Luo posted an update the next day, saying “Guys I’m only kidding ok! I’m under qualified to be escort lolllll.”
But his post has attracted some curious ladies, with over 600 comments in total.
So, what do you think? Would you hire a boyfriend for CNY just to get some relatives off your back?
Here’s a simplified summary of the South Korea martial law that even a 5-year-old would understand:
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