Last Updated on 2020-03-11 , 4:14 pm
Every so often, I encounter something that, for lack of a better phrase, turns me off my food for the next 6 hours or so. To exemplify, hereโre some situations I would be better off without in my sad, pathetic life:
- Walking in on my Aunt Matilda in the shower
- Clicking on Steven Limโs latest video by accident
- Hearing something go โcrackโ under my foot and checking it to see a gooey mess of what had used to be a snail
Yet, even so, none of those specific scenarios prepared me for what was coming. When I saw it, I was seized by a feeling so terrorising, so nauseating that all of a sudden, my Aunt Matildaโs sagging left buttcheek didnโt seem all that unappealing anymore.
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Which was a really traumatic experience, lest youโre wondering.
And so, before you continue, I feel it only appropriate to warn you thatโฆ what youโre about to see contains such disturbing images even Sadako from The Ring took off back into her well after seeing it.
Such is the terror of these images.
โฆ
Still here?
Well, youโve been warned.
Grab some vomit bags, prepare a running route to the toilet, for Iโm about to trigger all your worst fearsโฆ
In one single article.
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Surprise!
Over in Sydney, Australia, a man was inspecting a house when he came upon a landline phone, that looked dirty and non-functional.
And so, as everyone else would probably do in that particular scenario, he opened it.
Before:
After (itโs really not too late to leave):
Like really.
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โฆ
Well alright, you asked for it.
Goddammit, I barfed a little in my mouth just uploading the pic.
Here goes:
****
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And if you thought that was the worstโฆ think again. For thereafter, the dude started doing his job by clearing the landline of its uninvited occupantsโฆ
Which didnโt look pretty by any standard.
You can watch the whole video down below, though for the sake of your sanity we would strongly advise you not to.
Roach-kake
Now I might not possess exceptionally sharp critical-thinking skills. And yet even I question one thing:
Why are so many roaches huddled together in a move that mirrors the human centipede?
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Well, one Youtube user supposedly has the answer, though judging from the looks of it cockroaches might not be so different from humans after all.
Humans and booze, anyone?
And the moral of the story here?
According to Mothership, which unearthed a rather ancient Straits Times article dated all the way back to 1 Feb 2018 (2018 is ancient, okay), telephone receivers and wall sockets are ideal breeding grounds for cockroaches.
Why?
Well, the spots are dark, humid and rather accessible to food and water, just how cockroaches like it.
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Or maybe they were all trying to call back home to Yishun but realised soon after that landlines no longer work, so it was too late as theyโre stuck in a never-ending loop of Yishunix.
So if youโre on a quest to keep your brand new place entirely free of roachesโฆ you might want to keep those in mind.
And landlines out of mind.