Sexism is usually a problem for women, but it can affect men too.
We often place pressure and expectations on men based on an outdated notion of masculinity, which can have a harmful effect on their relationships.
One man found this out the hard way when he received his posting order during National Service.
Posting as an anonymous confessor on NUSWhispers, a platform for anonymous thoughts and confessions, the man described how his parents called him ‘guniang’ (meaning ‘sissy’ in Mandarin) because of his non-combat posting.
Now, before anything, just remember: it’s unknown whether this is true or not, since some confessions on NUSWhispers something seem a little too…sensationalised. Almost like it’s made for the Facebook algorithm
But moving on…
Supportive only at the start
The man claimed that his parents had initially been supportive during his Basic Military Training (BMT); they had called him at night, picked him up from Pasir Ris, and bought him snacks during his time at Tekong.
But their behaviour towards him changed when he received his vocation.
Not a ‘hero’ vocation
The man was assigned to be a logistics quartermaster, which is a non-combat post. This disappointed the man’s parents as they hoped he would be posted to a ‘hero’ vocation as they perceived it.
These ‘hero’ vocations include the Guards formation, the Commando formation (CDO), the Officer Cadet School (OCS), and the Naval Diving Unit (NDU).
The man’s parents even tried to use their connections and make requests to change his vocation but were unsuccessful.
Wait, can like that one meh?
A vocation for ‘useless’ people
The man then described how his parents berated him for being in a ‘guniang’ vocation that was meant for ‘useless’ people.
They also treated him differently after his posting.
He added that they had stopped giving him emotional support and greeted him coldly on his days off from camp.
They had also told him to lie about his vocation during family gatherings to “avoid embarrassment”.
But the most painful moment for the man was when his parents told him he would not be getting an inheritance because they said a ‘guniang’ is “not the breadwinner of a family”.
The implication that he was eyeing their money was especially hurtful for the anonymous poster.
But, despite all this, the man still expressed love for his parents, saying:
“Mum, Dad I love you both and should the time come, I would die for you. Is that not enough to constitute what a “man” should be.”
Critical Commenters
Some commenters sympathized with the man while others were critical of his parents.
Here is the full post:
So, real story or CSB? You decide.
Here’s a simplified summary of the South Korea martial law that even a 5-year-old would understand:
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