Science Has Found Out How to Raise Kids That Aren’t Self-Entitled

Last Updated on 2022-11-06 , 3:00 pm

With the strawberry generation being a generation that some adults call the “screwed-up generation”, you would want to raise your kid as someone who’s different from the generation.

But are the ways you have been using right? Here are some ways you can raise a kid who isn’t too self-entitled., according to an article in The Washington Post that we agreed. The best part is that it’s based on science! But just like any social advice, don’t cast it to stone–it’s merely a guide.

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Make caring for others a priority

When kids are young, parents tend to give in to each and every one of their request. Even ones they know are going out of the line. Giving them such power over you will just make them even more self-entitled.

Children need to learn to balance their needs with the needs of others. To do so, hold kids to high ethical expectations, such as honouring commitments. So rather than telling your kids “the most important thing is that you’re happy,” tell them, “the most important thing is that you are kind.” This thinking will follow them through adulthood and they will tend to think for others more than themselves.

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Providing opportunities for children to practice caring and gratitude

Studies show that people who express gratitude are more likely to be helpful and compassionate – and will be happy and healthy. When you need help around the house, ask the kids politely like how you would want them to talk to you when they are asking for a favour. They will learn from you. Do not give them reward for every little act of helpfulness (surprise, isn’t it?). This will make them be helpful only when they want something from you. You should expect your kids to help without telling them to do so subsequently.

So, from today onwards, don’t make them work for money. Best you’ve been doing this for a while, eh?

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Expand your child’s circle of concern

Children need to learn to care about people outside their family and friends. This will not only help them in terms of being outgoing but they will learn to care for others, even those they do not know personally. Ensure that your child is friendly and grateful with every in their lives – from close ones such as family members to strangers such as bus drivers.

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Be a strong role model

People often say you are the first role model to your child – and it’s true. They often learn ethical values by watching the actions of the adults they respect. When you yourself practise ethical values such as honesty, caring, fairness as well as acknowledging your mistakes and flaws, they will follow these values.

Show them that it is okay to make mistakes from time to time. Give your child and ethical dilemma or ask your child about dilemmas they’ve faced. This way you can teach them what’s the right way to deal with different situations they face in their lives.

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Guide children in managing destructive feelings

Often the ability to care for others is overwhelmed by anger and shame of negative feelings. Teach kids that all feelings are okay, but some ways of dealing with them are not helpful. When your child is calm, teach your child to stop, take a deep breath through the nose and exhale through the mouth, and count to give. When you see your child getting upset, do the steps together. This will teach them to always ensure that they learn not say or do anything impulsive when clouded by negative feelings.

Don’t just scold them or lose your temper. Like what’s mentioned in the previous point, they’ll learn that from you.

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