I’m not sure if you know about the five love languages, but I was introduced to them during a sexual education class when I was in secondary school.
As the name suggests, there a total of five love languages.
- Physical Touch
- Words of Affirmation
- Acts of Service
- Receiving Gifts
- Quality Time
Depending on the type of person you are, your love language probably varies, and I’m here to tell you more about them, as well as explain to you why it’s important for your relationship to know the love languages of you and your partner.
There are many expressions of love, and physical touch is one of them. You could be someone whose primary love language is physical touch if you particularly enjoy hugging, holding hands, kissing, and having sexual intercourse with your partner.
Somehow, you just feel more connected to your partner when you’re touching them.
This could mean that you don’t feel as loved if your partner doesn’t hold your hand, or doesn’t hug you as often as you would like.
When this occurs, you will feel down and upset, and may even start feeling insecure because you think that your partner doesn’t love you as much just because he or she doesn’t carry out as much physical affection.
While it may have a certain truth to it that there might be an underlying reason behind why they choose not to touch you, it could also be because their primary love language is something else other than physical touch.
Words of Affirmation
This refers to using words to affirm someone else’s actions. This means that you would feel more loved when your partner constantly tells you that you’re loved. You would also prefer a more active way of speaking rather than a passive one which just sounds condescending.
For example, you would feel more loved if your partner takes your feelings into account and thank you for doing something rather than making you feel like you were obligated to do it anyway.
You will also feel more loved when your partner gives you compliments.
“You look really pretty today!”
“You’re always able to make me smile after a bad day.”
Acts of Service
This refers to your partner doing things that they know that you would like. For example, it could be as simple as cleaning up the house, vacuuming up the floor, or even cooking you your favourite meal.
You feel loved when they take the time to do something for you and you will appreciate it even more because that’s your primary love language.
This refers to feeling loved when you receive a gift from your partner because it makes you feel like you were on your partner’s mind when they bought the gift for you.
You feel loved because you know that they put in thought to choose something special for you.
And it doesn’t have to be something grand or expensive. Sometimes, it’s just the thought that counts. And even little things like homemade cards show the effort your partner has put in, and you’ll instantly feel more treasured.
This refers to having the undivided attention of your partner. It means that you want to be the centre of their attention when you’re with them and not just with them physically.
This means that they shouldn’t be using their smartphones, shouldn’t be watching television programmes, and neither should they have any other distractions.
You feel more loved when you get to spend time with your partner and you could feel really hurt if they suddenly postpone dates because you might feel like they prioritise certain things over you.
Why Is It Important To Know?
You might think that as long as you love your partner and your partner loves you, there’s really no reason to find out their primary love language right? Plus, you already do most of these things, is it really necessary to find out which one they like the most?
The answer is simple, yes.
You may love each other, but not knowing how to express that love to make your partner feel loved can be a problem.
Knowing your partner’s love language will allow both of you to foster a stronger bond in your relationship because you know what your partner wants.
You will know how to make your partner feel more loved and you’ll no longer be confused as to why they’re so upset just because you cancelled plans to hang out with the boys for just one night.
You’ll no longer be confused as to why your partner doesn’t really hold your hand that often.
It’s not that your partner doesn’t love you, it’s just that that isn’t his or her primary way of showing love. Of course, you can always tell your partner what your love language is so that they will know.
This helps to solve a lot of misunderstandings that both of you might have about each other.
So if you haven’t already done the Love Language Test, try it out now by clicking here. You can also do it with your partner so that you’ll both see how similar or how different you guys are!
Hopefully, this article gives you slightly more insight as to what the five love languages are and why it is important to know them if you want to create a stronger bond in your love life.
This Singapore love story set in the 90s shows you why you should never wait for tomorrow. Watch it without crying: