Here’s a question for our female readers: Have you ever gone for a swim in a public swimming pool?
Female reader: Well, of course.
But did you know that certain dangers lurk in these pools?
Female reader: Like muscle cramps?
No.
Female reader: Drowning?
Well yes, but no, there’s something else… Something much, much worse.
Female reader: Oh dear, what is it?
Female reader: Sperm?
Sperm. Strong sperm.
Female reader: …
…
Female reader: I think I need to stop reading Goody Feed.
Indonesia Official Claims Women Can Get Pregnant In Swimming Pool Due to Some Men’s ‘Strong Sperm’
An Indonesian official has apologized for claiming that women could get pregnant from swimming in the same pool as men.
Sitti Hikmawatty, a commissioner from the Indonesian Child Protection Commission (KPAI), admitted that she made an “inaccurate statement”.
“It was a personal statement and not from the KPAI,” she said in a press release on Sunday, adding that she had already made a retraction.
Now, you’re probably wondering what her claim was. If you paid attention in school or watched Game of Thrones you’d know that sexual intercourse (or IVF) has to take place in order for a woman to get pregnant.
So, when you read the headline, you probably assumed she meant that being in a swimming pool sexually excites both men and women to the point where they can’t help but copulate like rabbits.
But no, this woman – who is the commissioner for health, narcotics, and addictive substances – said that women can get pregnant in a swimming pool because men might ejaculate in the pool after seeing them.
In an interview with tribunnews.com, Sitti said that women should exercise caution when swimming in a public swimming pool with men or risk getting pregnant.
“There is an especially strong type of male sperm that may cause […] pregnancy in a swimming pool,” Sitti said in the interview. “Even without penetration, men may become sexually excited [by women in the pool] and ejaculate, therefore causing a pregnancy.”
Let me attempt to summarise this woman’s belief: when a man in a swimming pool sees a beautiful woman, he instantly ejaculates and the sperm, who somehow knows the backstroke, starts swimming rapidly towards the nearest unsuspecting female victim and impregnates them.
She definitely did her research. Probably on theonion.com, though.
Sitti added that this type of pregnancy was more likely to happen if the women in question had reached an age of being sexually active.
“If women are in a phase where they are sexually active, [such a pregnancy] may occur. No one knows for sure how men react to the sight of women in a swimming pool.”
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Of course, because a woman getting pregnant in a swimming pool when she’s not sexually active would be crazy.
Ridiculed Online
As you can probably guess, netizens didn’t take too kindly to Sitti’s unscientific statements.
Her bizarre claims were ridiculed by the public and debunked by medical practitioners.
Indonesian Doctors Association (IDI) executive Nazar said it was “impossible” for women to get pregnant in a swimming pool.
“The water in swimming pools […] contains chlorine and other chemicals,” he said on Sunday as quoted by Antara news agency. “Sperm cannot survive in these conditions.”
Meanwhile, Indonesian netizens debunked her claims in a slightly different way: with memes.
In a post on Twitter, Webcomic artist KomikFaktap shared an image he created that was inspired by the theatrical poster for Steven Spielberg’s Jaws.
But instead of a scary shark emerging from the depths of the ocean to kill swimmers, the artist drew a school of “super sperm” swimming towards an unsuspecting female swimmer.
The webcomic artist captioned the post with “The importance of proper sex education”.
Pentingnya edukasi seks yang benar.#komikfaktap pic.twitter.com/JzkD0a3HoW
— KomikFaktap (@KomikFaktap) February 22, 2020
The movie title has also been replaced with AWAS (watch out).
Genius.
Others were less amused by Sitti’s statement, calling for her immediate dismissal from the KPAI.
Ternyata masih ada yg belum tahu kenapa cewek berendam di air banjir bisa hamil? Ini loh, beritanya.
Ini statemen terbodoh dan skaligus bikin malu lembaga @KPAI_official !
Sebaiknya komisioner yg sprti ini dipecat saja. Setuju? #PecatSittiHikmawattyhttps://t.co/uOB2SkHVkv
— Dumdum (@yusuf_dumdum) February 23, 2020
“This is the dumbest statement, one that shames the KPAI. Commissioners like [Sitti] need to be removed from office. Agree?”
KPAI’s Response
KPAI later responded, saying Sitti’s statement did not represent the organization.
“We hereby state that KPAI’s understanding and attitude are not reflected in the online news narrative,” KPAI chairman Susanto wrote in the statement on Saturday.
Whether or not Sitti will be dismissed remains to be seen. I’m just glad she wasn’t my science teacher, or else I’d never go swimming.
Here’s a simplified summary of the South Korea martial law that even a 5-year-old would understand:
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