Once something is there, it’ll always be there. So don’t disregard it, no matter what you do. Because you never know when it’ll creep up behind you, and weave around you. – Confucius the Romantic XVIIIIIII

And indeed, Confucius has struck the jackpot again, for those accursed weapons of planetary devastation have once again dawned upon us…

The e-Scooters.

Thought they were gone? You’re wrong, really wrong. They’re back, and this time…

They’re more of a nuisance than ever.

Not one, not two…

But three.

That’s right; the e-scooters, not satisfied with a meh comeback, chose to return in full glorious fashion:

Triple Threat.

And where better to host such a grandiose, epic comeback?

Yishun, of course.

What happened?

Three youngsters have been caught recklessly riding e-scooters in the peaceful neighbourhood of Yishun, endangering motorists, pedestrians and stray cats alike.

In the video, which is posted on Facebook Page ROADS.sg, three e-scooter vigilantes (?) can be seen whizzing past like VR Man in separate shots.

In the first segment of the e-Scooter show, we can see an e-Scooter rider treating the pavement like his own personal Hot Wheels track, and going at it so fast that a female pedestrian and a child had to leap off the pavement in order not to get blazed.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Damn, nasty brah.

In the second, an e-Scooter rider rounds a blue cab with what seemed like professional expertise and scrambles to catch up with the lead rider. At this point the owner of the dash cam can be heard saying “Wa piang oi”, which suffice it to say doesn’t exactly equate to sunshine and rainbows.

Give them a break; they’re probably taking part in one of those Fast and Furious races, e-Scooter edition.

Where’re the race girls??

And in the third, an e-Scooter rider shows off his spanking new wheels (with nitro boost and sleek accelarators to boot).

So fast… that’s what she said.

Comments

Understandably, Netizens took it pretty kindly. Some explained how e-Scooters should be banned, or equipped with laws that will probably better things.

Some warned of other impending ‘dangers’.

One dealt with it in the classic Social Studies format.

And one turned on his own kind (just kidding):

Penalties

Unbeknownst to the average Netizen, there are actually already laws in place to deter such riders.

Under the Active Mobility Act, piloting an e-scooter on the roads can get you fined up to $2,000 and/or jailed up to three months.

Repeat offenders, on the other hand, can be fined up to $5,000 and/or jailed up to six months.

Moral of the story

Don’t take your e-scooters onto the road. You might enjoy the thrill and adrenaline of going at it on the road, but you can be sure that pedestrians don’t feel the same way. Unless they’re masochists, of course, but they only exist in fictional books, not a sunny country like…

…

Alright majority anyway.

So go play some bumper cars if you want to play adrenaline.

That’s the only way you’re gonna bang anyone anyway, right? 😉

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