Criminal Minds Insulted S’pore; ST Couldn’t Take It So They Wrote Triple 9: Beyond Borders Script

If you haven’t been in the loop about this issue, well, it’s time to jump right in. Perhaps you might even want to take 5-10 minutes of your time catching up with what has been going on here. 

As many would have known, Criminal Minds: Beyond Borders did not portray Singapore in the best light – with lots of misjudged information about our little red dot portrayed in the episode. This sparked off a series of debates and a lot of hype in the Twitterverse.

A series better than Crime Watch 

And since the Criminal Minds: Beyond Borders Singapore episode is still very much a trending topic, an editor from The Straits Times took the liberty to lighten things up a little with a Triple 9: Beyond Borders script.

For those who are not familiar with Triple 9, it was a Singaporean action-drama television series that ran from 1995 – 1999 on Channel 5 back then. The show focused on the crimes and lives of police officers in Singapore and trust me, it’s way better than Crime Watch. 

Triple 9 also featured prominent Mediacorp artistes like Lim Yu Beng, James Lye and Wong Li Lin, and was a coveted Channel 5 show among many Singaporeans back then. 

Trust me when I say that this Triple 9: Beyond Borders is one of the better scripts I’ve seen so far. I would love for them to make this into a Singapore episode – and will watch this over Criminal Minds: Beyond Borders any day. 

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The Triple 9: Beyond Borders script 

Narrator: Every year thousands of Singaporeans leave the safety of our borders to enter the dangerous borders of the US. When danger strikes, the Singapore Police International Kaypoh Team is called into action.

James Lye voice-over: An American proverb says: “When in doubt, sound convincing.”

(Cut to a scene of a high-tech office on a plane full of screens. Lye and Wong Li-lin are video-conferencing with tech expert Lim Yu-Beng.)

James Lye: So a Singaporean in New York has been murdered and her friend was seen running away from the scene. Why does the USPF need our help?

Wong Li-lin: USPF?

James Lye: US Police Force. It is policy to refer to foreign institutions using Singapore conventions.

Wong Li-lin: Right. Anyway, the US experiences more than 12,000 murders a year, not to mention countless more incidents of gun violence. Their law enforcement is so beset by allegations of racial bias that it gave birth to a whole #BlackLivesMatter movement. Many politicians, including former president Barack Obama, acknowledged that their criminal justice system is broken but gridlock in Washington has prevented them from making any progress.

Lim Yu-Beng: Also, the leaders have been unable to pass common- sense gun regulations despite broad public support due to actions by the powerful gun lobby.

James Lye: Isn’t America where they had a famous sports star who got away with murder?

Lim Yu-Beng: In 1995, a hall-of-fame American football running back was acquitted of murdering his ex-wife and her friend even though he had blood in his car and he tried to run away after they started the investigation. A lot of people think he succeeded because he was rich and got some high-powered lawyers.

Wong Li-lin: I don’t know if our Singaporean unsub will have such luck.

Lim Yu-Beng: Well, running certainly implies guilt. And in today’s climate, he’s poor and non-white. That’s all the American courts are going to need.

James Lye: Sounds Orwellian.

(Cut to scene on New York street that suspiciously looks like Woodlands. American flags hang prominently in the background.)

American cop: In the interest of national security, the US is going to build this big, beautiful wall. Also, the US spies on nearly every e-mail and every phone call made here. For this man to disappear into thin air takes knowledge and planning.

(Everyone huddles around an electronic map. Dots appear around a southern state. Wong Li-lin gasps.)

James Lye: You know it?

Wong Li-lin: It’s the dark side of paradise. Officially it’s known as Florida, but more accurately it’s a crazy state with a thriving underworld. One time, a pet store owner slapped an employee with a big lizard. It is the embodiment of income inequality. It’s just a lot of poverty, human trafficking and a lot of crime. It’s even worse than Yishun.

James Lye: Oh my god.

(Cut to scene where crime is solved and everyone is smiling.)

American cop: Thank you very much. I could not have solved this crime without you. By the way, wasn’t there supposed to be one other officer from Singapore?

James Lye: Yes there was, but he couldn’t make it. He flew United.

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Somebody please give this editor a medal. Or better, he deserves a promotion. 

Since you’re here, why not check out Goody Feed’s YouTube videos as well? They’re so Singaporean, I bet you’ll like them!

This article was first published on Goodyfeed.com

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