There’s no doubt about this: put a Singaporean and a Malaysian in a room, and it’s almost impossible to tell which one of them holds a pink IC even if you converse with them in English.
The only way to differentiate them is to ask them which country’s nasi lemak is better.
With our culture so similar to Malaysia, it’s no surprise that people watching Crazy Rich Asians didn’t know who’s Singaporean or who’s Malaysian.
But it seems like that’s a generalised mindset, because a Malaysian has just related an experience that is, for the lack of a better word, bizarre.
Here’s what happened.
18-Year-Old Teen Came to Singapore to Live with His Friend
Ah, you see? Other than having similar culture, every Singaporean has at least two or three or five Malaysian friends. After all, a million years ago, most of the foreigners studying or working here in Singapore are Malaysians.
So this Malaysian teen, who’s unnamed but we should call him Losty, came to Singapore on 26 December 2018 and went to stay with his friend. He had intended to look for a job here, and that fateful day, he decided to head to the nearby café for lunch.
For the weirdest reason ever, he decided to leave his passport, RM1,500 and most importantly, his phone in his friend’s house.
Apparently, after his lunch, he tried to get back to his friend’s house and his ordeal started.
Every building looked the same to him.
But instead of asking for directions, he continued to walk, like he was a character in a PlayStation RPG. And soon after, he realized he was lost.
Then he started his quest: he decided to continue to look for his friend’s flat by hook or by crook.
But that’s when it got bizarre: he still didn’t try to ask for directions.
Heck, even characters in RPG would talk to passers-by to seek advice.
Walk Aimlessly for 10 Days
I kid you not; according to reports, Losty walked 12 hours a day just to find his friend’s flat.
In total, that would have been 120 hours of walking: according to Google Maps, he could have walked way beyond KL, reaching Ipoh.
But anyways.
He hadn’t sought help from anyone or borrow anyone’s phone because, well, he’s shy and he didn’t know how Singaporeans are.
Wait, Losty. You mean you didn’t know Singaporeans and Malaysians are long-lost brothers? Didn’t he hear people saying “leh, lah, loh”, or if he’s from KL or Ipoh, heard people speaking in Cantonese?
During the 10 days, Losty used the toilets in cafes and shopping malls. At night, he would sleep outside HDB flats (???can one meh???).
He had tried to look for a Police station but couldn’t locate one.
When he started his quest, he had $50 with him, and so he had cai png every day. Not sure why this is relevant, but Losty if you can buy cai png you should have spoken to a Malaysian liao mah since there are quite a number of Malaysian cai png hawkers who can cook good cai png?!
By the eighth day, he used up his $50 and because he was starving and dehydrated, he begged money from strangers. But Losty if you dare to beg people for money why can’t you just ask them where’s the police station?!
Eventually, he was found at Haig Road.
How, you ask.
Friend Has Been Looking for Him
Remember his friend? Well, at least he could have tell Losty that Singaporeans are human beings and not everyone’s from Yishun.
When he realized Losty is lost, someone (not sure if it’s Losty’s friend) put up missing posters, and a police report was made.
Translation of text:
Please share this
Missing Person Notice:
Name: Chong Losty (we made this up of course)
Malaysian Chinese
Age: 18 (About 172 cm)
As of 26 December 2018, Losty came to Singapore to look for a job and it’s his first trip here. The last time he was seen is at 13A Sturdee Road, Singapore 207841. A police report has been made, but there hasn’t been any news yet. His family is worried about him; should anyone see him, please contact us!
Apparently, it was spread quite widely online.
On 6 January 2019, an elderly lady saw him sitting alone in a park at Haig Road. She recognised him from the missing poster (elderly you boleh lah got use Internet one) and finally brought him out of his misery.
Losty has since returned to Malaysia, but honestly, Losty should return to reality and learn to stand up for himself because take a look at this.
He was last seen at Sturdee Road and found not at Perth or Bali, but at Haig Road.
He spent 10 days walking aimlessly around an area that’s about 5km apart. He was never far from his friend’s house: while all buildings look alike, he could have just asked one person for direction and he would be home with his phone, passport and RM1,500.
Well, at least Losty learn something valuable: the cai png in Singapore is pretty good. Right, Losty?
After all, he dared to ask for money because of cai png.
Nothing can stand between Losty and cai png.
Watch this for a complete summary of what REALLY happened to Qoo10, and why it's like a K-drama:
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