Guys, here’s a friendly tip:
Never behave suspiciously around your girlfriends or wives. Never.
“Why? What’s it to them? What’s it to you?” you demand.
In response, I simply point at the article headline you clearly gazed at before proceeding here.
That’s why, peeps. 🙂
After all, blue balls are still better than no balls.
Woman Stabs Husband’s Testicles In His Sleep Because She Suspected Him Of Cheating
In Singapore, women tend to throw tantrums when their hubbies go astray. But it seems that over in Sri Lanka, they go for a more logical approach:
Stabbing men in the balls. Free-flow.
According to Kwong Wah Daily and The Star, a Sri Lankan woman had suspected her husband of cheating on her. After a heated argument which presumably sent her into a blind rage, the woman reportedly reached for a knife when he fell asleep…
And stabbed him in the neck and testicles.
Wow, that’s dark.
According to the reports, the incident had transpired in the couple’s rented home in Meru in the early hours of Thursday morning (12 September 2019). Apparently, she fled the scene after stabbing him, effectively leaving him for dead.
Damn, that’s brutal. Mortal Kombat‘s just a video game?
Think again.
Thankfully, the man is now in stable condition, though his injuries were undeniably severe. At the moment, he’s believed to be undergoing treatment at the Raja Permaisuri Bainun Hospital.
No clue whether Father’s Day is still a possibility though.
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The Hunt For The Elusive Ball-Stabber
According to Acting Ipoh OCPD Supt Mohamad Nordin Abdullah, the weapon that was used in the assault was swiftly recovered, and the police are now actively looking for the man’s wife.
The incident will reportedly be investigated under Section 326 of the Penal Code and Section 18 of the Domestic Violence Act 1994.
Don’t know what that is, but when you see Penal Code, you know it’s serious shit.
Moral Of The Story
Lest you haven’t gotten it, the moral of the story’s pretty simple.
Guys, stay true to your significant other. If you wanna cheat, make sure to break things off properly before you embark on your little Dora The Explorer adventures.
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And girls, please abstain from knives, even if your significant other was caught bedding thirty grandmas in one night. After all…
Why risk life behind bars, for an asshole who doesn’t deserve any more of your time?
So do the right thing, ladies. Your happiness triumphs all. Ditch the anger, hatred, and be one with the wind.
“You’re just scared you’ll kena the same thing right?” my colleague smirked.
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