Poll Finds That 53% of Republicans Believe Trump is True US President, Say Biden Won Due to Illegal Voting

By
Avery
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You know how, in North Korea, Kim Il-sung is still the Eternal Leader of Juche Korea even after he literally died? 

Clearly, people in the United States decided to commemorate Trump’s diplomatic inroads with North Korea by conferring upon him the same honour.

53% of Republicans Believe Trump is True US President

A Reuters/Ipsos poll found 53% of Republicans still believe that Donald J. Trump remains the “true president” of the country, according to The Straits Times.

This came after Joe Biden won the presidential election last November by more than seven million votes. 

Or, you know, lost by two trillion votes because an alien brigade summoned by Hillary Clinton took over all voting stations and stole the election from the Victorious and Magnificent Mr Trump. Nothing but cold Republican #faxandlogic.

The poll, conducted from 17 to 19 May, yields around the same result as one that ran from 13 to 17 November last year, in which 59% of Republicans believed that Trump was the true President.

Hm, maybe that remaining 6% betrayed the Republicans to defect to the Democrats’ side. How dare they!

Explaining the belief, 61% of Republicans believe the election was “stolen” from Trump by Biden thanks to turnouts of illegal voters. You know, after Biden engaged in historical levels of voter suppression and claims of election fraud and pursued over fifty meaningless lawsuits trying to overturn a perfectly legitimate democratic result. 

Wait, Trump did those. Sorry, I got confused for a second, you know, like the 3% of Democrats who also believed Trump is the true president.

Well, free speech I guess. If I tried to say that Tan Cheng Bock is the true Presid— [REDACTED]

Only 29% of Republicans believe Trump bears some blame for his supporters’ lethal riot at the US Capitol. Which is confusing, because you’d think Republicans would give their Eternal Leader of Fascist America more credit for leading the first rebel occupation of the Capitol since 1812.

67% of respondents, however, suggested they trusted election officials in their local precincts to perform their jobs with integrity. This includes 58% of Republicans, because it adds up that if election officials were honest at their jobs, the election must be fraudulent.

Trump Planning 2024 Run

Riding on this never-ending wave of delusion and inability to process basic facts that are well-established comorbidities of Republian Party membership, Trump clearly has ambitions for another Presidential run in 2024.

Speaking to the Conservative Political Action Conference in February, Trump confidently projected that “a Republican president will make a triumphant return to the White House,” according to The Straits Times.

“I wonder who will that be?” he added, smiling. “Who, who, who will that be, I wonder.”

Well, if you have to “return” to the presidency, you imply you aren’t currently the true president of the United States. You heard him, Republicans. Dare you be disloyal to Mr Trump?

He has also created a new website, www.donaldjtrump.com, which when you log in greets you with a huge poster that “WE CANNOT ALLOW AMERICA TO BE DESTROYED.”

Biden should pay him for that ad.

Feature Image: Evan El-Amin / Shutterstock.com

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Avery
Email: [email protected]